Homemade things & A.D.D. & Eliminating the Bad, help!

I go through various spurts of well intentioned attempts to make my family opt for healthier options.  My reasons are varied.  My oldest son, now 25 (who I am not supposed to mention on my blog) struggled with some learning difficulties and was diagnosed with ADD around kindergarten age.  From the time we adopted him at 18 months, until we FINALLY got him graduated from high school at age 20, every day was a struggle.  We had more than our share of doctors and therapists and technicians and IEP's and tutors and conferences and possible and assorted diagnosis, and the list goes on.  He never had the H (hyperactivity) factor, but his main issue was focus, or rather inability to maintain focus.  Unless it happened to be something he had an interest in and then it was an issue of "attractability" where he had difficulty transitioning to the next thing. I think one of his last diagnosis was "PDD not otherwise specified". Naming the difficulty didn't matter.  It was the struggles that mattered.  And how to cope. What and why was not as important as what next.  We believe a lot was hereditary  and poor prenatal care (drug use)and we had little birth history, not that that mattered. As you can imagine, this did not bode well with traditional schoolwork or home life in general.  We learned lots of strategies along with medications, which helped to compensate to ease some of the difficulties.  It was always a struggle.  ALWAYS. It still is.  The deficits are still there.  The school system failed him immensely.  Yes he graduated and yes he met the goals they set, but whenever he had difficulties the goals were lowered rather than more assistance.  Mike and I knew too little about Special Services and needed placements to advocate as we should have early on.  By the time he was in middle school and high school, we had an educational advocate for him and he was given a full time aide and yes, it was better, but those early years took it's toll.  The triplets were born when he was in 6th grade.  You can imagine how the 5th grade (pregnancy) and 6th and 7th grade (preemies, infants) took a toll on our ability to focus as fully on his issues as we would have liked to. 

I say all that to say this - there were times I saw that certain foods and additives and coloring impacted his behaviors and abilities immensely.  For example Fruit Loops sent him bouncing off the walls. This was long before it was trendy or even common knowledge about the pitfalls of all the artificial sugars and colors and such.  From about age 3 to age 7, we severely limited refined sugars and artificial colors.  It made a huge difference.  Once children get school age, it gets more difficult to monitor.  Throw in a second child (we adopted Matthew, who was a very sickly and clingy baby) and some very difficult family situations like caring for my mother who had cancer and eventually passed away and my father's accident which resulted in a hip broken in nine places and a couple of years of wheelchair, walkers, therapies, etc - life.  During this time, I was also working full time.  It was a difficult few years.  We made it through but much of those years are a blur. When he was 12, the triplets were born. 

Watching and monitoring foods is a very consuming job. It's tough to tell three crying hungry babies to wait while I make some bread from scratch so it is natural without high fructose corn syrup.  When an infant is in and out of the hospital with seizures and then bronchiolitis from RSV, and another has pneumonia,  it's not "sorry I can't be there because I have to make sure the ketchup and fries are not laden with refined sugars.".  Life was hard. 

I am not making excuses, but I was tapped out. My plate was beyond full.  I got lazy and we went back to a lot of the easier old ways of not always making the healthiest choices. I could cite excuses of unemployment, underemployment, teen stresses, infertility issues, sick babies, loss, depression, etc, but the why's of how I got there are immaterial now.

All that is background.  Where we are now is important.  My two older boys are grown - adults - who have to make their own decisions and choices. I can guide and support and advise, but they are in charge of themselves.  The younger ones and Mike and I are the focus right now.

Back to my original point of making better choices.  It's a process and a relearning of good habits.  My biggest vice is Diet Coke.  Mike too.  I feel like I am totally addicted to it. I am addicted to it. I can take coffee or tea or leave it, no big deal.  But I love DC!  I am vowing, promising, swearing, I plan to totally be rid of soft drinks this year, this 2012.  I have been buying the 8 pack of smaller bottles of DC, and having one each day.  Eventually I will wean off of it.  I am drinking more water.  I like water - plain and I like water with lemon.  I don't know why I don't drink it more.  Lazy I guess because it's much easier to grab a coke.  I am keeping a pitcher of tea in the fridge for Mike and the boys.  And trying to lessen the sweetness of it, using agave sweetener.  Which they are not happy about. Oh well. My girl likes water. She and the boys like milk too. But I buy 1%. 

New substitute - and the kids actually like it.  Add fresh orange juice to seltzer water and sweeten = homemade orange soda.  It's really good. And fizzy.

We are taking vitamins - multi vitamins.  Also I take fish oil and D and B12, in addition to my thyroid meds for Hashimoto's.  I need to add calcium.  I've been taking melatonin at night and I have been sleeping better. The kids and Mike do just the multi.  Any other ideas or thoughts, shoulds or shouldn'ts.

And I am trying some new things out in addition to more fruits and veggies and leaner meats,  Homemade yogurt made in the crock pot.  I hate to mention it because I don't want to sound like one of those "all natural" nature goddess moms, but it turned out pretty good - and economical.  I have oatmeal for breakfast, with banana and some nuts and Silk soy milk.  I am definitely a work in progress.  I think my goals are overall to eat better as a family, combined with weight loss (for me, hopefully), eliminate HFCS and the dyes and artificial stuff. 

I am open to suggestions and advice.